Sunday, September 10, 2017

The Old and the New

Has it been a long time or what!? Every new beginning starts with a little old and a whole lot of new.. and that new comes in the form of a different look for my blog and (hopefully) a whole bunch of posts to record this new life as a wife! ;-)

After getting married last month (I know, a lot has changed!) I contemplated starting a completely new blog. I've had an itch to write again and my husband has supported and encouraged me to get back into it. Since a new journey has begun, I wanted to start fresh. But as I struggled to figure out what I wanted to call it and what I wanted to write about, I realized that this blog has shaped me and it encompasses a huge part of who I am. Abandoning this blog and starting another seems almost like erasing a very important chapter in my life, something I'm not willing to do.

As I was trying to get a feel for what this blog became, I took the time to skim though some of my writing throughout the years. I thought back to how on earth it even began.  When I graduated 8th grade a very special lady gifted me a purple journal. That summer, for the first time, I started writing. Most weeks I journaled almost every night. I finished my high school years with 3 journals complete; one for my freshman year, one for my sophomore year, and one that encompassed my junior and senior years.

After starting my second semester at the U, I remember sitting in the HC building one morning waiting to head off to my first class. I'd been feeling stressed out with living in a new state, being a new college student, and dealing with Spencer's health struggles. Without much thought to it, I picked up my computer and quickly made a Blogger account, a blog, and wrote my very first post. I had no idea if I'd keep up with it, I honestly didn't really expect to, but I thought it might help me with expressing myself.

This blog became so much more than I ever expected it to be. It was my place to vent, my safe spot to express my fears, and my place to share some of the best memories that I'll cherish forever. It not only helped me, but it also helped so many other women who have went/are going through similar hardships and celebrations as myself which is not something I ever expected to happen. That reason within its self is enough for me to continue with what I started 7 years ago.

This blog ended up telling the story of my young adult life and the many complex emotions and events that made me who I am to this day. The young woman that I was on January 22nd, 2010 has grown into such a beautiful, loving, and complex women who just happened to have a very rough past, but who has an incredibly bright future ahead.

As I start this new chapter in my life with my wonderful husband and ridiculously nutty dog, I won't erase and forget what made me, me. Instead I want to continue to record the memories, the celebrations, the struggles, and the heartbreaks. I want to remember as much as I want to live this "new" life to the fullest.

"In the end, she became more than what she expected. She became the journey, and like all journeys, she did not end, she just simply changed directions and kept going." R. M. Drake